Categories Blog Memes & Asks Personal

The Friday 5 For September 24 2021

Picture from Pixabay.

Answers to today’s questions at The Friday Five @ Dreamwidth

1. What were you doing in 2001? 2011?

2001: having fun with my Mom’s Beagle Caro and my friends. I’d go over to my Mom’s pretty much every week so my Mom, the dog and me would see each other all the time. Also my best friend would come over to my place (she lived with her parents, I lived alone) 2-3 times a week for like 5-6 hours if we were both unemployed. Otherwise we’d see on the weekends. We’d also go on adventures because I had my Mom’s car in use, so we’d explore the nature and towns around our city, and also sometimes make shopping trips (comics) to Helsinki along with some sightseeing there. Often we’d take Caro with us when we went hiking/walking. Those were great days, the best of my life! I still had hope of a good future – of a steady job for myself, and both Mom and I were still healthy and Caro the Beagle was so sweet and loving and fun. I planned to get a dog myself when I had steady employment, and a breast reduction. Life was good! And then from September on, everyone would wonder about the terrorist attacks in the US.

2011: praying I’d get some sort of clarity on why I had been having daily diarrhea for going on three years now (the Crohn’s Disease diagnosis was still a year away but once I got it, it made things mentally better – I knew it wouldn’t go away and I would need to learn to live with it, how to manage it), and praying they could resolve my horrible non-stop headache/migraines. Not knowing whether I could hope for better about those two was awfully stressfull. Also diabetes and hypothyroidism were starting and for a few years it felt like everytime things seemed to level out, a new health problem would pop up. So illnesses and feeling sick every day took all my attention and all my thoughts pretty much. I in such a bad shape both physically and mentally that I don’t remember much else from about 2008 to 2014.

2. What’s something you’ve kept going for over a decade?

Doing fanart (wallpapers, icons etc.) and my fansites. I’ve been doing them faithfully since I started in 1996… so 25 years! I’ve reduced the number of fansites I own drastically, and I don’t have the energy to do wallpapers/icons as often as I used to (I might go a month or two without opening Photoshop, but I’ve never stopped completely but I still collect photos and think about what I want to do next even so), but I enjoy making both fansites and fanart very much still after all these years!

3. What’s an anniversary you want to mark down and celebrate?

If I ever get disability retirement due to my chronic migraines, that certainly is something I’ll celebrate! I feel like I’m on the wrong benefit when I’m on unemployment because the 300 days of long sick leave is all used and there’s no other option. Or if my chronic migraines get better once my periods end and hormones stop (doctors say that it might happen, and also my Mom’s best friend says that once hers stopped her migraines became much less often and less bad – so there’s hope I guess even if I can’t quite believe it), I’ll celebrate that too!

4. What would your past self think of your present self?

That I’ve had a long run of bad luck what with my all my illnesses, and that I’ve failed because I never got a steady employment (quite general in women my age around me) but also that I’ve done well for myself, finding other purpose and joy in my life, such fansites and creative pursuits.

5. What was the first online communality that you loved?

I really loved the fanart Usenet Xena and Hercules fandom in the late 1990s and early 2000s – it also expanded to other scifi-fantasy fandoms, and that’s where I made my first wallpapers and learned so much from makers such as Mike Quick and Beth Smarr. There hasn’t been anything like it since. The Livejournal days were also good fanart wise, so much creativity! My first fanfic community was the Oded Fehr fandom – which was and still is the only one I have finished fanfics for! The fabulous writers at Weaver Of Dreams and Land Of Dreams wrote just the kind of fics I love to read the most about my favorite character Ardeth Bay from The Mummy and other characters Oded Fehr had played, and was very welcoming to newbies in my experience. I still miss that fandom at its best but people have moved on. I was very fortunate to be trusted to adopt both the fanfic archives once the original owners could keep them going anymore; there are so many great stories that would’ve been lost otherwise.

Categories Blog Health Memes & Asks Personal

Feeling Weird Now… the friday five for August 27 2021

I’m having one of those weird days. Alternately being cold and sweating with certain of my Crohn’s symptoms acting up somewhat so can’t go far from the bathroom and my head still feeling a little left over worseness from the migraine yesterday but also feeling weirdly energetic anyway. All my household chores are done, don’t have any vacuuming or washing to do… It’s so weird feeling like this. Can’t seem to concentrate on anything (even reading which is something I can usually do no matter what) and am sort of feeling like I’ve been gently wrung out and then left hanging the wrong side out… lying down feels weird, sitting feels weird, walking outside feels good but I’ve already done that twice today and it’s only 10am… So have answers to old The Friday Five questions.

1. If you could design your life exactly how you’d like, how famous would you be?

Not famous at all! I wouldn’t mind people recognizing my name in certain circumstances such as a patron of something that people associated with the organization in question would know me, but I don’t want to be famous or a celebrity or anything like that.

2. How often would you travel?

Do I still have Crohn’s Disease and chronic migraine? If yes, propably not a all. Except maybe for travelling abroad to try out treatments for migraine not available here.

If not and money’s not an issue (because I’d have all the money I could want – because if I could desig my life as I like because then I’d be rich…) I’d like to make one long trip (like 6-8 weeks or more) a year to some place I’ve always wanted to see – like visit the US/Canada and travel across the country cost to cost, seeing places like Niagara Falls, Yellowstone and Grand Canyon, New York, Miami, Los Angeles, Boston, Rocky Mountains, and many many more places. These trips would have loose plans and I’d take my time seeing all the places I want. Or alternately I’d make 1-2 shorter trips a year for maybe a week at a time, such as to Cairo or London or Paris, or even just a few days in London whenever I liked. London’s one of my favorite places in the world, and I’d love to be able to go there whenever.

3. How many people would live with you?

I’d live alone, but I’d buy a big house and have staff come in to clean and maintain etc. I’d also have a cook so I could eat proper meals every day (I prefer home cooked food, but I don’t have energy to cook regularly) and because I feel quilty if I don’t eat the food others have made for me (I have problems with appetite, made worse by being chronically tired and too often after I’ve cooked, I’m too tired to eat and/or am not hungry anymore), especially the greens and vegetables. I’d propably get a dog, maybe. I’d have to think about seriously though whether I could be a good dog mom with my illnesses and tiredness.

4. How often would you eat out at restaurants?

About once a month or every other month. I like eating out (fast food doesn’t count here) but more as a treat every now and then.

I’d be likely to do a lot more, is cafes! I don’t do cafes now at all really. Like once a year, at the most (and none during COVID-19). They’re either much too expensive, or what you get for your money isn’t that great. But I’d love to spend money in the few cafes I like, just watching life around me and meeting a friend or my Mom.

5. What new hobby would you get into?

I’d probably want to try many things because I’d have the big house where there’s a craft room or two so now I’d actually have the space to do a lot of things I don’t have the space for now, or the money to buy materials to just make them for fun, or to just try out without knowing whether I’ll stick with it. But it’s the lack of space that’s the big thing. I’d like to try jewellery making, and making acrylic rings, acrylics coasters and clocks. I can’t now because I don’t have to space to store the needed tools and materials, or have space to leave my work out to dry etc. I’d also do large versions of the things I can do now: watercolor and acrylic painting. I got to do some woodwork when I was a kid in school (woodwork was for boys, while knitting and sewing was for girls, but boy and girls had to switch around for a few weeks one year to get some experience from the other side), and liked it, so I’d like to try that again. It’d also be fun to learn to make clothes, so I’d pay someone to teach me or take classes or something. I don’t own a sewing machine, and when I looked into prices of fabrics some years ago, buying fabric to make a sheet, or a t-shirt or whatever, cost just as much or more as buying one ready-made so it doesn’t make sense now to spend money on a sewing machine.

I’d definitely want to own my own (computer) server! So I’d be able to have as much space I want/need for my sites, and still be able to make sure the server is powerful enough to serve the sites fast. So it could be pricier than what I can do now.

Categories Blog Memes & Asks Personal

The Friday Five for September 17 2021

Can’t believe it’s been a month since I last posted anything!

Snagged this from The Friday Five @ Livejournal.

1. Are you looking forward to Autumn (or Spring, if you are in the other hemisphere)?

I don’t have to look forward to Autumn – we’re in the middle of it 😀 But yes, I always look forward to the Autumn through a summer.

2. What is one thing that marks this season for you more than anything else?

Cool, crisp air and feeling I can breathe again. Trees are also so pretty when their leaves turn to orange and red.

3. If the months are indicative of your age, with January being your birth and December being the
end of the line), what month are you in?

This is a difficult queston! Depends really on how my chronic illnesses, especially Crohn’s Disease advance (there’s a higher risk of colon cancer). If I were healthy, I’d propably be in June or maybe July. But my illnesses could make it so that I’m already in August or September… could go either way!

4. Do you welcome the cooler/warmer days or mourn their loss?

I welcome the cooler days!

5. What is absolutely one thing you have to do in the Autumn/Spring?

There’s nothing, really. Closest would be seeing my Mom on Christmas Eve and eating Christmas foods, but that’s in winter.

The Friday Five for August 20 2021: Luxuries
Categories Blog Memes & Asks Personal

The Friday Five for August 20 2021: Luxuries

Answers to today’s questions over at [email protected]

1. What luxury is totally worth the price?

A Roomba!

And if I could have A/C for the summers, I’d totally embrace that, it’d be worth the price if I had the money in the first place. Never mind that at least 9 months of the year you wouldn’t need it so I used to think real A/C would be ridiculous.

Frezza Choco Loco, a chocolate coffee cold drink. I LOVE it!

2. What is the most unique or silliest problem you have going on in your life at the moment?

Well, the last two days I can’t decide whether to ink Kosumosu or Murasaki-shikibu next… as far as problems go, that’s on the silly side!

3. If you were so wealthy you didn’t need to work, what would you do with your time?

Not worry about money.

Otherwise I’d propably do pretty much what I’m doing now – my health problems and lack of money determine how I spend my time more than anything else in my life. So with the money problem gone, a big half of my problems would be gone too. Maybe I would volunteer somewhere because I wouldn’t have to worry about TE-toimiste/KELA suddenly deciding that I’ve employed myself by volunteering and yanking my livelyhood. I’d also be curious to see if freeing up the mental energy and space previously taken by worrying about money would over time lead to more interests, activity and energy.

If I were wealthy enough I’d donate to some charities/organizations such as the local and national organizations that try to improve the financial and political position of the unemployed. I’d also see if I could do something to help research the treating of migraines if I were really rich, like giving grants or something.

4. What is the most tedious and/or the most exciting sport to watch?

I don’t watch sports they’re all tedious and I donno/don’t care who wins what where how. YLE’s newsfeed has been half sports news (a lot more than usual) for like two months now because of the… olympics? donno… and I’m so fed up with it. I don’t get it why they can’t give the sports news their own dedicated feed and regular news their own; both sports lovers and haters would love that.

5. What do you think the ideal age to be is?

I think, from about age 32 upwards – the stupidy and anxioussness of youth was behind me by then and I started being comfortable in my own skin.

The Friday Five for 13 August 2021: A Family Set
Categories Blog Memes & Asks Personal

The Friday Five for 13 August 2021: A Family Set

Answers to today’s questions at [email protected].

1. Did you grow up with your parents together as a unit?

For the most part. My Dad died of cancer in 1989 a month before my 15th birthday, but until then my parents were together. Mom later told me that Dad had suggested a divorce when it became clear that the cancer would get him, so we wouldn’t have to watch him die. My Mom wouldn’t hear of it. They had a good marriage.

2. Did you reach adulthood with four living grandparents?

On my mother’s side… only my Mamma who was my maternal grandmother. She lived until I was 25, in the late 1990s. Maternal grandfather died about a decade before I was born/adopted so in the early 1960s. My paternal grandparents… I’m not sure… I think one of them was alive when I was a toddler, but I don’t really remember… I have this faint memory of meeting a strange (as in unknown to me, not weird strange) woman when out shopping, and Mom introducing her as Dad’s mother but I don’t really remember them at all. I think I was about 4-7 years old at the time. I think there was some visiting sometimes during my toddler years, but so few and far between I never remembered/recognized them. But I’m pretty sure I reached adulthood with only one living grandparent: Mamma.

3. Is your extended family a close one or not?

I’m adopted and an only child and I don’t have a spouse, so I don’t have an extended family in that sense. I have cousins, aunts and uncles. Technically, I have biological brothers and sisters but I don’t consider them family nor have I ever met them, or my biological parents.

No, we aren’t close at least on this side. My Mom had two brothers; Mamma and my uncle who lived with her (we always saw them most) are dead, we hardly ever see or hear about my other uncle and my cousins. I do like my oldest cousin (a woman) a lot – whenever we see each other it’s like we’ve never been apart, but the other two are more of strangers.

I’ve never really known my aunts and uncles on my Dad’s side although I remember that they occasionally came to visit when I was small. My Dad had 8 brothers and sisters and we saw some of them sometimes when I was a kid, but they lived a long way away and I guess my parents and them were never close and over time contact stopped. I don’t know if any of them had children/grandchildren. I do know two of Dad’s brothers were sent to Sweden to be safe during the war with Soviet Union and they never came back, instead were raised in a family there. One the of other the brothers lived in Helsinki and one sister in Harjavalta and them we visited like once or twice a year. It was always a full day trip when we went. I remember loving the car rides but seeing the relatives? I didn’t really care about that one way or another. Huh, I think I should ask my Mom about that side of the family! I don’t really remember much, especially about my paternal grandparents. It’d be nice to know if I ever met them! Mostly I remember my Dad’s side from old photos, except for those two live in Helsinki and Harjavalta – them I remember “live”.

Even in the 1980s and before when we still had more or less regular contact, whether that contact happened once a year or more often, we never had “clan gatherings” where the whole family would get together.

4. Does your family have a ‘black sheep’?

I don’t think so but since we aren’t close I would know. My Mom’s other brother, the one who lived with Mamma, was a little weird but I don’t think he was a black sheep. These days I guess he’d be called developmentally challenged, but back then he was just a little weird. Although I might be one – unemployed, chronically ill, unmarried/not in a relationship of any kind, childless, into fannish things. All things that people look more or less down on. But I don’t feel like a black sheep, so I don’t care.

5. What is your first memory of a family member that is not your mother(s) or father(s)?

I don’t have a memory of that, but when I think about it I feel it’s Mamma. Just because we saw her the most – a lot more than anyone else. We visited regularly, and she visited us regularly. I also went over to hers by bike alone or with my best fried sometimes. So it must be Mamma.